I know this blog has been a long time coming. I started penning it on Saturday evening, but had to stop as it brought forward so many emotions. But, its now finished and ready for you to read… I did say you guys will get a different side of me through my blog so here goes…
On the last day of high school, with my some of my Northlands Girls High buddies
In high school, I was a ‘roamer’, I was friends with so many different clicks. Here I saw how extraordinary the power of young girls could be. When girls combine their powers, they’re a force to be reckoned with; they can take down their teachers, render some social outcasts and can be so manipulative. Oh and I went to an all girls school…
With another dear friend. See how long my natural hair is. *wink*
I learnt early on, the skill of avoidance. I didn’t want to be part of the “good” or “bad” side hence I became a ‘roamer’. I threw myself into my books, sports and any extra mural activity I could get into. One of these “avoidance” mechanisms, for me was entering pageants, which actually brought me more attention and name calling than I wanted. The great thing about being a pageant girl was that, I, better than anyone else, I got to understand girls’ dynamics.
With my “twin” Khabonina Shabangu, @ the many pageants we entered together.
The pageant world teaches you to be best friends with the person you’re competing with. Its pretty warped if you ask me, but it had a lot to do with how I view female dynamics and it was the best training I could have ever asked for to deal with the entertainment industry. Look, this in no way means that I view everyone as my competition. I was brought up to believe that I was the only obstacle to reaching my goal and therefore I compete with only myself.
With Diana Maphapho @ the Shimmer Motions cover shoot
The many shoots and events we attend as entertainers, take me back to those pageant and high school days. Where I used to sit and observe the room dynamics and how best to find my fit in the room. The pageant world also taught me, the importance of sharing. In those years, my mom was a working wife, mother and part time student. She couldn’t be there for most of my contests, my dad had to go with, but could not come into the dressing room. My fellow contestants’ mothers would all faff around me, helping out to “beautify” me. When I won, beating their precious daughters to the crown. I’d see the pride in their eyes, as they had a hand in “prettifying” the queen. Pageants taught me that if something is yours you’ll get it and if not, it was just not meant to be.
With Di-Di @ the Miller Music Tour West Shoot
In the two years I’ve been in this industry, there’s nothing I enjoy more than being in a room full of personalities, as it allows me to “read the room”. This to me is always very interesting and the drama comes in hilarious under tones, especially knowing some of the dynamics in the room.
Guys, the truth is we’re not all BFFs. Some people have worked harmoniously together and then there are those who haven’t. Some like each other. Some just don’t. Its real life dynamics under the umbrella of the “GLITZY” entertainment world.
Getting all glammed by Mpumi Ntintili-Sinxoto @ my private shoot
I remember the first time I was in that space. I felt nervous, shy and a sense of “I shouldn’t be here.” I didn’t know how to conduct myself in a room of so many stars, so I naturally went to my comfort zone; I had laughs and great convo’s with the make-up and hair stylists.
The industry is tricky; you always need to be aware of your space. You need to know your place. Never over estimate it, and never underestimate it either! Almost everyone at some point gets it wrong. I know I have at times. And the only way to get it right is to get there for the task at hand, be you and move on. Most times we forget that relationships and friendships are forged best when there has been a natural gravitation towards each other. Relationships cannot be created or forced in order to play up for the cameras. On the off chance that I find myself not “clicking” with someone, I switch to professional mode – as I’m there to do a job and a harmonious environment always guarantees great results.
Izak Letele doing his thing @ my shoot
The thing I’ve come to learn is that, in this industry, we are all good girls. Our problem is that early on in our careers and throughout, we get fed a lot of B.S. that deceives us into thinking and seeing each other as competition. This is utter rubbish. Its time we learnt to run our own race. To stay in the lane one has been allocated or chosen for themselves. There’s a reason why those lanes are not marked and shaped in the same way. As an athlete at school, and now watching from my couch, I see too many athletes on the running field being disqualified for stepping onto another racers’ lanes. Even the fastest man on the planet, Usain Bolt, found himself on the disqualified list at last year’s World Championships.
Chilling with Lorna Maseko backstage @ Gauteng Sports Awards
My experiences along the way have taught me to always remain true to who I am. Never forget the journey that led me to this part of the race – the helping hands along the way. Thus I will never not whip out an extra pair of earings, that I have that best suite the next girl’s outfit. As all those years ago, it was people’s helping hands that ensured I reached the next level of my race.
@ the end of the day – Minnie Dlamini is the only one I compete with…
So ladies, its about time we used our combined powers to kick arse – continue running our races as individuals. But how awesome would it be, if we had each other to point out the shortcuts, the curves, the bumpy and smooth roads – but most importantly have each other as voices of encouragement when we get tired. To wait at the finishing line with a some bubbly to laugh and celebrate each other’s milestones. Well… A girl’s gotta dream…
Love All Around